# Thread: Any good maths jokes?

1. ## Any good maths jokes?

Need a laugh. Any good maths jokes?

2. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

There was an expert accountant who was well versed in game theory. He heard that his intelligent niece, who was five years old, always took a 50p piece, when a choice between a 50p piece and a pound coin was offered to her.

He went to see his niece and offered her just such a choice. She took the 50p and said

"Thank you Uncle".

The accountant tried to explain to his niece

"You must understand, a pound coin is twice as valuable as a 50p piece, so you should always choose the pound coin."

The niece replied

"Uncle, but then people will not offer me any money."

3. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

Three logicians walk into a bar. The bartender asks, "Do y'all want a drink?" The first logician says, "I am not sure." The second one also says, "I am not sure." The third one says, "Yes."

4. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

How are ugly chicks like prime numbers?

Nothing will ever go into them except one and themselves

5. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

Why are amoebas the most intelligent animal in the world?

Because they can multiply by dividing!

6. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

Originally Posted by ebaines
Why are amoebas the most intelligent animal in the world?

Because they can multiply by dividing!
I can do that too, I just divide by some number in between 0 and 1...

Does that make me an amoeba? ><

7. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

polar bears are regular bears, after a coordinate transformation.

8. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

. . $\begin{array}{c}\text{What is the difference between} \\ \text{a }psychotic\text{ and a }neurotic? \\ \\ \text{A psychotic thinks }2 + 2 \,=\,5. \\ \\ \text{A neurotic knows that }2 + 2 \,=\,4 \\ \text{but it worries him.} \end{array}$

. . $\begin{array}{c}\text{What is the difference between} \\ data\text{ and }in\!f\!ormation? \\ \\ \text{382436: data} \\ \\ \text{38-24-36: information} \end{array}$

9. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

Originally Posted by Soroban
$\begin{array}{c}\text{What is the difference between} \\ data\text{ and }in\!f\!ormation? \\ \\ \text{382436: data} \\ \\ \text{38-24-36: information} \end{array}$
This reminds me a quote from the article "On the Essence of Mathematical Proofs" from the book "A Stress Analysis of a Strapless Evening Gown" (1963) (double translation to and from Russian).

Relying on mathematical proofs, scientists managed to unite previously disconnected areas, thermodynamics and communication technology, into a new discipline: information theory. "Information," defined scientifically, is proportional to surprise: the more surprising the message, the more information it contains. If, having lifted a receiver, a man hears "Hello," this will not surprise him very much; there will be considerably more information if instead of "Hello" he gets an electric shock.

10. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

He thinks that he is really smooth, but he is only C¹.

11. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

Rastamath: I and I are orthogonal.

12. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

Originally Posted by Deveno
Rastamath: I and I are orthogonal.
Umm, can you explain that?

13. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

Good jokes.....

14. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

Nice math joke , vary funny joke i can't stop laughing..

15. ## Re: Any good maths jokes?

What goes oink $\frac{22}{7},$ oink $\frac{22}{7},$ oink $\frac{22}{7},$ ?